Domingo 9 de noviembre de 2025

I'll be honest I've been having a really hard time with Spanish, not as far as with the language, but with motivation. I feel no connection to it, emotional or otherwise. I see no identity, I do not identify with me in the language and I can find no me in the language, I'm still searching. Without identity, there is no language, I need me for language, so I've been having a hard time with Spanish and I'm not pushing it, because if I do, it will be spoken the way you speak Spanish in the average American high school and I'm not doing that. That's not the objective.

While I'm having this hard time with Spanish I'm taking a break from active studying. I've actually been motivated to instead speak Italian (of course) and (surprisingly) English. Now I want to learn English. Learn English. But anyway, even before I had just decided to take this break with Spanish, I decided to order a book. A few weeks or days ago I don't know, I ordered some books and I was excited about reading, one in English, one in Spanish, and one in Italian. The books have been here a while, but hadn't been opened. I just opened them. You know what I did when I opened the one that's in Spanish? I smiled. I perhaps squealed? I'm excited. That's what I'm looking for. I need excitement. I need desire and excitement. And I'm excited. So, I'm going to read this book in Spanish, I don't know any Spanish, and I will translate as I go, and I will speak Spanish, and since I am connected to this book, I'm excited about the story, I will forge a connection to Spanish and it will be done. This is the way it will be done. For now, this is what I think of. I think it will go well. I'm excited to read Spanish, I'm excited to read this book regardless of whether it's in Spanish, and alongside this reading, Spanish acquisition will be natural and we'll see what happens.

Ta ta for now!

20:26

20:39:07

This is so working. I've only read the inside book cover with the About the Author and the two line dedication and I'm already wanting to learn more words and write in Spanish. This is exactly what I needed.